I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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