Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I woke up in your car in the McDonalds parking lot. What the hell happened to 'no man left behind'?
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
The uberlube is also flammable
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
