ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
Randomize