Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
If he eats mayonnaise, he's not getting laid. End of story.
after you took your Demerol you started flying around and talking like the robot ship on the movie Stealth. then you licked my iPhone and declared the mission a success.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
I shouldn't be home alone with this much peanut butter and the dog. I feel like i'm being recorded to see when my desperation will peak.
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize