I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
