That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
Randomize
