oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
WE'RE FINALLY ADMITTING THAT WE DESPERATELY WANT TO SCREW EACH OTHER. THIS IS WHAT PROGRESS FEELS
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
