i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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