you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I JUST MACED MY OWN FACE
This is by far the best text I have ever woken up to.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
