We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
Also I know you probably did not understand anything I said on the phone last night but thank you for pretending.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
DO NOT PREHEAT THE OVEN THIS MORNING! WE STARTED USING IT AS A WINE STASH AROUND MIDNIGHT.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
