I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
i'm signing you up for texting rehab
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
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