he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
You got kicked out after 30 minutes, 3 beers and 2 shots. Group record. Also you kept rubbing his belly and calling him buddha.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Randomize