Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Randomize