I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
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