areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
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