Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
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