is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
i dont even know how to be here
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
not that i'm not about exploiting men for money
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
Randomize
