Strawberries are so good its weird that food is growable
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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