I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
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