I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
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