your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
First things first, I always get more drunk than the birthday girl. Like, who's idea was it to sing karaoke? I killed it.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
the most terrified I've ever been was seeing Danny Devito squirming on the ground in this underwear, covered in hand sanitizer, completely hairless
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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