The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
ALL CAPS CUZ ITS SERIOUS SHAME.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
