He shouted my World of Warcraft name while we were having sex, and he was sober.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
we need to invent and abuse teleportation
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Randomize