An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
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