Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
im in an endless cycle of being too hung over to eat all day...then getting too drunk because i didnt eat anything. where is my life going?
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
We smell like vodka and hangover
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