He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Randomize
