Midget sex pt 2 tonight
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Are my feet made of real feet?
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
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