So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
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