Have you ever had champagne poured on you during sex? It was like a rap video
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I told him I was going outside to throw up and I ended up passing out in the front yard in my underwear for 45 minutes. When I walked back inside he said "where have u been?". My husband ladies and gentlemen
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
Randomize
