I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
He brought over a 20 dollar bottle of wine. Who does that? This is college.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
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