Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize