Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
Drinking at work by myself... My boss just walked into me copying my face on the copy machine..
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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