since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
This beer is not sobering me up at all
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
