you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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