Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize
