Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
