Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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