How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Randomize