I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Woke up this morning with one boob drawn on to look like the globe. Questionable?
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
He just sent me a dick pic with his iPod held up next to it and the words "in relation to iPod." Geekiest booty call ever.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
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