How'd it feel making her break her religion?
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
I turned on Elf, made myself a mojito, and am eating one of a sleeve of Ritz. You tell me if I wanna go out tonight.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
I love how my parents bring water bottles filled with vodka on family trips
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
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