Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize