Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
Randomize