It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
She knew it was going down when I had her search for "condoms" in my iPhone Maps.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
try to milk me bitch
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
