shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
A hard boiled egg and a shot of tequila is not brunch.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
I supernannyed him into submission
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
