Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
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