Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
Randomize
