that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
There's glitter in my speakers, piles of cheezits on the floor, a random Audi in the driveway and a homeless dude napping in a lawn chair in the backyard. Wtf happened last night?
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
female sloths literally scream when they want sex and can be heard up to 700 meters away
i think i might be a female sloth
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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