Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
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