Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
Is 36 too old to fuck a college student? THIS IS BOTH IMPORTANT AND TIME SENSITIVE
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Randomize
