Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
Randomize
