I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
Randomize
